i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
