"it" just moved
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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