what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
