I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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