I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
