Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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