what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
