so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Ladies don't puke and tell
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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