Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
