I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
