I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize