last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
