fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
