tell your sister to shave her snatch
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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