so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
