did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize
