didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
