i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
