He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
and i looked up. we had an audience...
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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