I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize