If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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