You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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