god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
A bitchslap is in order.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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