Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
