But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize