New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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