let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Randomize
