I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
this boner is exhausting
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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