there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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