Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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