he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize