If i come over, it means nothing
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Randomize
