Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize