Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
