Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
