is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
