You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
