I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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