lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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