try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
