scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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