Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Randomize
