so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
