There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
