glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I can tuck mytits in my pants
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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