i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
