I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Randomize
