why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize
