They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
is that a dick in a sweater?
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
