I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
